Shepherd of my Heart

Name:
Location: Singapore, Singapore, Singapore

Thursday, January 31, 2008

Dance mania

Went to Vivo with lao gong today and "stumbled upon" a group of china dance troupe performing traditional cinese tribal dances!!! It was so beautiful except for a few mistakes (think they will get a very good lashing from their dance instructors after the performance has ended). I was so enticed by it that I wanted to dance on the spot!!! HAHA. Now lao gong finally knows what kind of dances I like. She even said she can imagine me dancing traditional dances, instead of hip hop. HAHA. Which is quite true, I also cannot really picture myself doing hip hop, despite having attended dance mtv mix class last year. I always almost burst out laughing when I look at myself in the mirror because the dance room was all mirrors!! I was so super small size, and so skinny and with so long long long hair, that I look more like dancing either indian or chinese traditional dance, rather than dancing hip hop and jazz!!! So in the end, I seriously think it was a skeleton dancing hip hop and jazz!!!!! I seriously want to learn dancing. I was all set to learn dancing in a proper dancing school after graduating from jc, but Singapore did not offer any dance courses that really cater to my interests. At that point of time, I wanted to go to China and learn dancing, or India, but end up, in NUS. Sian. Haiz.

Lao gong and me were chatting when I asked her what would she like to be if she's born in ancient korea? She said rich man's daughter. My answer is totally opposite from her, and perhaps most of you would be shocked at my answer. I want to be a courtesan (gisaeng) in ancient korea. Because in Korea, only a gisaeng is able to learn arts, as in literature, calligraphy, music and dance. And I would trade anything and give up anything just to learn dancing, even till now. But if in ancient China, I would want to be a rich man's daughter, preferably a high ranking officer's daughter. Because I also get to learn all the arts and music and maybe dancing too (behind the back of my father, hahaha, Perhaps I might sneak into a brothel or dancing school to learn from the courtesans or dance instructors). But in Japan, I would rather be a peasant girl. In this case, I would not want to be a geisha because I don't like Japanese dancing. And if born into a rich man's family, girls are treated like goods and "sold or married off" to other noble family which I never like. Unlike Chinese dance, all other traditional dance are quite restricted in their movements and styles and costumes. India, the main costume is the sari, change here and there, still the same old thing. Japan nothing to change. Korea, although can change and alter their costumes but still same piece of hanbok. But Chinese dance on the other hand, is super flexible and it has many types because of the various tribal groups in China. And their costumes are so aplenty!!!! 简直是舞和服装包罗万象!!!That's why I love Chinese dance. But I doubt I am able to make my wish come true.

aaja nachle-from aaja nachle

This is new movie by one of my faourite bollywood actress- Madhuri Dixit!!! She's the bollywood queen. This is her first movie after she left the movie industry to get married and now she has two kids!! I am trying to learn this dance now (all by myself, sian.)

Sunday, January 27, 2008

天上有上帝

I have been humming this song for the past few days. It is from the movie "House of Flying Daggers", starring Zhang Ziyi, Andy Lau and Jin Chen Wu. This song is so nice and meaning and is so true for the ancient times. It is performed by Zhang Ziyi. Below is the lyrics. I did the tranlsation on my own, it may not be very good, but at least the meaning is there,

北方有佳人 (There's a beauty in the north)
绝世而独立 (She's not only extremely beautiful but also independent)
一顾倾人城 (One look at her, you will offer your city)
再顾倾人国 (Another look at her, you will offer your whole country)
宁不知,倾城与倾国 (Without realising, you offer both your city and country)
佳人难在得 (It is difficult to keep a beauty by your side)

In the past, even up till now, guys are always captivated by beauties. They will do anything either to get her or just to catch a glimpse of her or to please her. Hence, you will either offer your city or country. And in real life examples, Emperor Tang XuanZong had to put his favourite concubine to death for the sake fo saving his country. And another emperor from the Zhou dynasty lost his whole country within one night. In order to make his favourite concubine smile at all cost, the emperor tricked all his subjects and military generals that the country was in danger. Thus, to have the company of a beauty is good, but it is diffcult to keep her and please her. There are still many examples lah. That's why in chinese, there is this idiom--红颜祸水。I personally think it is rubbish because it is the guys' fault!! Not we girls!! And they actually all the blame on girls when they lost their country or money. And to label my extremely beautiful and non comparable ancestor lady Yang as an evil concubine really makes my blood boil!!! But now I changed the lyrics into one that worships God. HEHE

天上有上帝 (There's a God in the heaven)
绝世而独立 (He's not only extremely beautiful but also independent)
一顾得解脱 (One look at Him, you will be freed from the chain of sins)
再顾得永生 (Another look at Him, you will gain eternity)
宁不知,解脱与永生 的生命 (Without realising, you will gain both freedom and eternal life)
上帝难在得 (It is difficult to keep God by your side)


I maintained the second verse because God is definitely beautiful and shiny that no one is comparable to Him. And God is definitely independent because there is only one God and He did everything by Himself. Just by looking at God, it is said that one will trembles because He is too bright (even brighter than the sun) and the sight of Him might blind our eyes. However, it actually dawn upon us that He is able to free us from the chains of sins. Another look at Him, we will obey and do whatever He commands, than we will be able to enjoy an eternal life with me as well. Thus, soon we will enjoy the benefits of both without us realising it. However, it is easy to know God but very tough to embark on His righteous path because it takes alot of courage and determination to walk in His ways. Therefore, it is diffcult to follow or keep God's ways.

Saturday, January 26, 2008

Happy 21st bday... :P

Just attended my friend's 21st bday party not long ago. I was so relunctant to go because I only met her a few times when both of us did Relief Teaching in KSS, and we went out once only. That was all back in year 2006!!! Although she will sent me cute and funny sms lah. But that was all. So when she invited me, it is not nice to reject mah. So got another difficult task, what present to get for her??? I started praying to God for help. And ended up buying Royce chocolates for her. Then I prayed to God for help again because I will be all alone at her bday party. I told God to accompany me, but God said NO!!!! That was irritating lor!! At the time when I needed someone to be by my side, He told me NO!!! MAD!!! So I told God, ok lor, then you send someone to chat with me lah, if not I will be so 可怜 lor. Then if the person is a Christian, all the more the better. At least got a common topic to talk about. And His reply was "Don't worry."

So when I reached the bday girl's house, I ate alone and was all alone lor!! Then just as I was about to sit down and rest, a familiar girl was right in front of me!!! Ane she was from my chinese business modules last semester, we were in the same tutorial and we chatted only twice, altogether less than 10 sentences!! But the bday girl was from NTU, they knew each other through chinese lesson back in jc. And later, I realised that the girl was also a Christian!!!! Wohoo!! No wonder God said He is not going to accompany me lah, because I will be busy making friend with this girl!!! HAHAHA. Thank God. And the bday girl sms me and told me she love the choclate!! YEA!!!

So I am happy now!!!

Busy x1000000 timessss......

Lao gong has been complaining that I never update my blog for a long long long time. Well, it is because I hate blogging and things that are similar to writing a diary!!! So troublesome.

But anyway, this semester has started and I'm really really extremely busy. I will not be at home everyday!!! Tuesday, wednesday, thursday are schooling days--so little girl needs to go school and study and be agood little girl. Monday, wednesday, friday, saturday and sunday are tution days--so little girl need to transform into a fierce and strict teacher, so she will be able to handle 3 kids, one of which is my beautiful mixed-blood neice!!! So, you can see, my super packed schedule and I'm really tired. It is not just plain tired but extremely extremely tired.

But the sight of my little niece makes me happy because she is so cute. Although she is just 5 years old, but I think she is very smart for her age. Except her chinese makes me want to 吐血!!! So lousy!! And she will frown and sthink very long when I asked her chinese or some tough questions. HAHAH. But I will make sure she will be the no 1 or at least one of the best students in her class for all subjects!!! HAHA. My niece attends a christian kindergarden, so she knows her bible stuff quite well for kids her age. She is always the no 1 in her class for doing well in her bible stuff and memorising and reciitn gof bible verses!!! So, halfway during tutiton, when she was writing "t w o", she told me "t" looks like a cross. Below is our conversation, although it is mostly one sided lah.

Niece: "You know this "t" looks like a cross? Jesus died on a cross. God (Jesus) lives on a cross. He makes the earth, the sky, my nose, my eyes, my lips, makes me, makes so many thing, you know ornot."

Me (looking shocked and stunned at her sudden answer and change of topic): "Oh, I see. Who teach you all these? Your teacher?"

Niece: "Yup."

Me: "I see. But Jesus does not live on a cross, He died on the cross." (Then my niece nod her head and said "yup").

Me: "Do you love Jesus? Do you know if God loves you??"

Niece: "Yup, I love Jesus, and God loves me. I sing a Jesus song for you. Very nice one. Jesus makes ........ me me me me. Jesus.... you you you."

And there she was singing for me, although I can't really make out what she was singing about because sometimes it is difficult to fully understand what a child is talking. Below is another conversation regarding Jesus again. This time I was teaching her to read and recognise the word "SEA". Then she looked at the picture which is "SEA" and said:

Niece: "You know Jesus makes the sea also? I can swim inside and won't die because Jesus is there with me and He won't make me die. Need to wear the the the the swim swim thing (she couldn't describe what is the equipment so I guess it must be the scuba diving equipment) on your head, then you dive inside, but you won't die because Jesus won't let you die."

Me (Again got taken aback by her sudden digressing of topic, I still don't understand why she can relate sea to Jesus won't let you die): "Oh!!! Ya lor. Ok, how to read the next word."

HAHAHA, cute right, my little niece!!! I was telling my cousin about this on friay when we met up, and my cousin said she (my niece) know's more than me!!! But I was quite afraid that her mother which is my cousin would know about this thing lah, cos later she thought I preached to my niece. The thing is, it was my niece who started it!!! HEHE

But of course, I prayed that my niece will be smart and obedient and pretty and holy in God's eyes lah. Will be seeing her tomorrow again!! Yea!!

Sunday, January 13, 2008

焕然一新

I spent the entire afternoon packing my room yesterday!! Because the super "jie pi" me prefers to get dirty all at one go, instead of packing it weekly or everyday which will make me dirty everyday!! HAHA. I shifted the position of my books and files, and replaced the original place with my bears and decorations ornaments and my trohpies!!! Wohoo!! Looking back, I think I should have joined more sports competition and get more trophies (cos confirmed will get trophy 1, hehe)!!!! I hang my cross stitich again, but haven't drill 7 holes yet!! So I used those previous nails to support my cross stitich. Asked my dad to get his workers to redrill 7 holes, and he said must wait until I finished my other 2 cross stitich 1st!!!! But that will take me another 1-3 years!!! Because one of them is a very very very big and long and complicated peacock cross stitch!!!! It resembles that of a chinese painting!! So, can you imagine how tough it would be to finish that peacock cross stitch???!!!

And I was telling my mum maybe after my peacock, I will buy a $100 plus plus 百花齐放 or 富贵华开 picture to do!!! It was another type of cross stitch that resembles another chinese painting and this is even longer, and bigger and more complicated~~~ HAHA. But have to depend on my mood lah.

Now I got a "new" room with a very "new" look and "new" furnitures and "new" feeling. Cool

Pissed off.... by lao gong

I was so super pissed off at my piggypig lao gong lah!!! We were chatting on msn just now and she told me they celebrated my "Prince Charming's" birthday!!! And she never even tell me a single thing about the celebration!!! What is worse is that she knows that guy is my "Prince Charming"!!! PIG!!! Super pissed off!! Where in the world did I get myself such a bad lao gong???!!! I just can't figure it out.

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

Kushibo trip

Finally went to Kushibo with mei mei today. HAHA. Was quite relunctant to go cos it is a male!!! So I asked God and He said can go. But I was still abit nervous because it is so funny to go out with a male. And I am not sure why God said can go or if I heard wrongly, so I asked God for a sign. I told Him if He really wants me to go, then mei mei will either msg me via msn or sms on monday or tuesday, asking when I want to go to kushibo. And true enough, mei mei msg me on monday, but he never really asked when we will go, because I was sick and just receovered. But on tuesday, he msg me and asked when we shall go!!! I was telling God "God, you are so cute lor!!! HAHA!!"

So today went to kushibo with mei mei lah. That pig came out late, but I was smarter, I came out even later. HAHA. Starting both of us were very quiet, I just pretended that no one was beside me. Mei mei even asked me why I'm so quiet, and I replied, then what do you want me to say?? On the mrt, we kept quite for about 10 mins, then we talked. During this awkward moments, I msg lao gong and told her to pray for me and to keep myself occupied. And stupid mei mei also took out his hp when he realised that I just don't want to talk to him!! But in the end, we did talk.

When we reached Kusihibo for buffet, mei mei was so cute!! He asked me to go and take my food 1st, while he stayed to take care of my bag, I said no need (cos I know my God will take care of it for me, he always does!!!)but he insisted!! And so, I took all the food that I like and went back to seat. Mei mei was still there guarding my bag!!! Before that, he went to take his ice green tea lah. So when I'm back, he asked me what I wanted and he get ice green tea for me too. After that we ate our food silently for the 1st 10 mins, and chit chat again. HAHA
Mei mei is really a gentleman cos he kept on take cha soba, refill my drink (in which he mixed up both our cups!!!), chawamushi. spoon and tenpanki(chicken and fish) for me!!! We chat alot lah, but about general stuff. In the end, he said I really eat alot!!! HAHA. much more than his female friends. Then we went to foot the bill, but it was mei mei who payed for the meal!! $58.38!!!! I wanted to pay him back but he kept on refused!!! I was abit irritated lah, cos I never like the idea of guy paying anything for me!!!

After that we went to buy royce chocolates cos I was craving for it. I bought two packets of royce choclates, then the saleperson said buy 3 get 1 free, I said no. But the cute mei mei said might as well just take 3 cos get 1 free, I told him I took a very long time to finish a box of chocolates, and he said he will get the 3rd one and pay for it. This time, mei mei wanted to pay again, but I was nearer to the counter and thus beat him to it!! so I paid $38.40 for 4 packet of chocolates. And I refused to take the money from mei mei, I told him I still own him money, but he kept on refused to accept from me. Sian.

Later, we shopped for awhile cos I need to buy birthday presents for 2 people. I was surprised that mei mei followed me into the precious moments shop, cos I had expected him to stay outside. Then we went back, I went home, he went for his 'tui na' session. He was so cute!! He at 1st said he will escort me to the mrt, cos he wanna take bus to the 'tui na' shop. Then he went to find a bus for me, but no bus. So, both of us took the mrt in the end. HAHA. Funny mei mei.

At 1st I thought things would not go smoothly, but I prayed and God said He will help me, so I just surrender everything into GOd's hands. Thnak GOd everything was fine lah. Both of us managed to talk in the end, and was quite comfortable lah. HAHA

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Sick again..... :(

Haiz, here I am, sick again. Down with sore throat since saturday but I ate strepsils and the pain was no longer there. But had a super duper very bad running nose yesterday night till today morning. So I went to see the doctor. Haiz, and I was supposed to meet myjc friend tomorrow, wonder if I am able to make it. I mean I just feel giddy because of the medicine. Then friday got another lunch date with mei mei at kushibo!! Just when I was so happy about eating all those yummy food, I'm sick!!! What a wet blanket!! And that irritating weight of mine remains at 39kg, sometimes at 40kg, but still no progress have been made so far.

Last semester was definitely a very chaotic and packed and tramautic schedule for me. My ever once giant appetitie is gone officially--thanks to God. I think HE thinks I eat too much and feels the need to contol my diet. So now I eat very little, but maybe still alot than some of my friends. HAHA. I can forsee that this coming semester will be avery busy one as well.....